Outside my Kitchen Window

Looking outside my kitchen window, I realize it is another day in Winter Paradise. The weather forecast says a high of 18, a low of 14. Hmmm. I think it sounds ironic—all of this reporting of “highs” and “lows”… I mean-- "Really? A high of “18”?? In my mid-winter mind, there is nothing high about “18”.

So many decisions to make…should I wear my brown parka, with matching Sorel snowboots, brown scarf, gloves, snowmask and ear muffs or should I wear my down ski vest, five layers of thermals, leather gloves, and snowpants? These are the thoughts that occupy my mind E-V-E-R-Y-D-A-Y.

My favorite TV channel since moving to the Midwest has been The Weather Channel. My kids laugh and are slightly embarrassed for me, but it helps me cope, mostly in the winter. If Carl Parker tells me that it will be 35 degrees and sunny on Wednesday, I count on it—I live for it! Sun is a rare commodity in January in Ohio.

Canela trying to catch some winter rays...where are her paws and I think her bottom must freeze??!

This winter I’m hoping to change my attitude and look for the virtues of my cold-weather climate. As I have looked, I realize there are a few. First, snow is really beautiful—it makes our trees white and puffy and our yard is like a thick cotton blanket. Snow is also fun—sledding, snowmen, snow angels. Done that and made a few this winter; now we need to find a hill so we can ski! Snow slows things down a little bit too. We drive slower; occasionally, we even have a “Snow Day” and school is cancelled and we play games in our pajamas or go to movies. And, then I remind myself that all of this snow, and sleet, and ice will eventually melt and then come the beautiful trees and green hills and grass—all of the things I really love about the Ohio countryside. So I will impatiently wait to thaw and count the days until Spring!

Shopping in NYC...a balmy 19 degrees. Don't you love the 10-layer look?

My Sis

For five years my sister Linda has battled cancer. She has been an amazing survivor, enduring rounds of radiation and chemotherapy treatments. She has been an optimist with an enviable attitude—I’ve often wondered that if I were in her situation, would I have been so positive? Maybe not.

On Christmas afternoon her husband called to tell me that she had passed away. I can’t really explain how it feels to lose a sister. It’s harder than I thought it would be. I think in life that we just expect our parents to go first. I think our parents expect to die before their children, and for that, my heart aches for my mom who has now lost a child.

I believe that there are two things we can take with when we die—our relationships and the things that we know. I will forever be grateful to Linda for making the trip to Utah this past July when I was visiting with the kids. We spent two good weeks playing, taking walks, eating, and laughing. My kids love their Aunt Linda. Every birthday there was a package with a homemade card waiting at the doorstep. We laughed because it would take at least 15 minutes to open her presents—cutting through the multiple layers of 3M packing tape. Her favorite story to retell to me was when she tried to negotiate adopting Carly with Zach. Carly was about 1 and Zach was 5 or so. She told Zach she would trade Blade (their Golden Retriever) for Carly and Zach said “OK”!! I think he was ready to sign on the dotted line! (It took me an hour to convince Zach that we would NOT be trading Carly). Another time she took the boys on a walk in her neighborhood in Reno. They were climbing a large hill and were out of eye-shot of her home. Zach and Josh were about 3 and 4 years old. Jokingly, she said: “I think we’re lost. I don’t know how to get home!” Josh runs over to a little boulder, climbs it, and starts yelling: “Hellllp…Helllp!” I love her humor; that was just her way and I love her for it. I will miss that so much.

As for the things that she knows, she knows a lot about being a good wife and mother. She was a great mom to two wonderful boys, Jason and Matt. She knows how to be a good friend. The best thing about sisters is that you can be both sisters and great friends. I will miss my sister and my friend. Over the past few years, I have seen her renewed belief in the power of faith and prayer. I know that it was her faith that sustained her during these last few months because she told me so. Those are the things that she knows and will take with her.

I am happy to know that this life is just a step in a great plan. It’s really the only way to get through a loss. And I am comforted to know that families can be eternal. I believe this, I hope for it, and I am banking on it!